I Guess, I Guess

One of the most popular tv shows in taiwan nowadays is 'Wo Cai Wo Cai Wo Cai Cai Cai' literally translated 'I Guess, I Guess, I Guess Guess Guess'. And one of the main activities that goes on in that show is: the show invites 3 guests who are odd in some manner. For example, an old lady basketball machine champion, a rough looking man who is into ballad dancing, or even a nerdy tertiary student who receives grants to make horror films. Basically their occupation or hobby usually does not match the way they first appear. Then, after a short interview on the show with the host, the celebrities on the show are to guess which one
of the three guests are bogus. And they usually get it wrong, because the picking of the guests and their talents, and the ordering of the interviews are very strategic.

Well now, let us play 'I Guess, I Guess I Guess Guess Guess'!

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(1)

I used to wear hats a lot. Wherever I went, I always used to have a hat in my bag. I never wore it for the weather; it was just the thing to do.

One day, i was at a camp at Phillip Island. It was one of my first camps i've ever been to, and it was very exciting. One of the most exciting activities we played was canoeing, where we canoed into a still part of the ocean. The weather was rough that day, and as i was in the front end happily rowing with my dad at the back, the wind came and took my chicago bulls cap into the water behind me. I plunged into a spin, and i lunged out with my oar to brush back my cap towards me. At that moment, my dad stopped my oar with his hands. I looked at him and he said: "Shi qu yi ding mao zi, jiu suan le ba. Jiu rang ta qu ba." (Lose a hat is no big deal, just let it go.) I listened to my dad, I didn't argue with him, and I stopped my struggle.

It was just like one of those scene, where the son is set to fly to a foreign country for a certain reason. The father and mother go to send their son off at the airport. On the way, there the mother reminds the son of all the safety precautions along the way and who to call when there is trouble, and the father just tells him how proud he is of his son. It comes to the time, at the airport terminal gates, when firstly the father hugs, then the mother hugs, then the son says his final goodbye and walks slowly toward those doors. As the music increases in volume, the mother's eye starts to tear. The father feels her heart, holds her left hand with his, and slings his right arm around her shoulders. The mother has nothing other to say, except for the love in her eyes.

I watched my hat go just like that. I was only small at that time and all i knew was that my chicago bulls hat had followed me for a long time. At that time, no other hat could replace. And eversince that day, I had not worn a hat again.

For a limited time only - now I am over it. Except that now i don't have any hats to wear. Why don't you buy me one, and it will remind me of you.

[GONG~]

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(2)

I went to a good friend's house for dinner one night. I usually don't like to turn down invitations, for one, i am not anxious of uncertain circumstances and for two, i have skin thick enough to accept any body's generosity. At the door, I knew who was going to be in the house at that particular time. I took a deep breath and sighed.

As I walked inside the house, I greeted the host, and heard clunking of dishes in the kitchen. As i slowly walked toward the kitchen, i had an image of her with her back towards me in my mind. Sure enough as i stepped through the door, she looked very much the same to what i imagined her to look. She must had heard my footsteps. She turned around to greet me with a few preliminary conversations. That was the first time i had ever talked to her.

I did a lot of things that night. Most of the people there I had not known. And most of the people i had known i had not really known. But to cut the long story to the point:

As we moved into our tired nights, and that 'i will go if you go' rut, somebody finally stood up and started a chain reaction of leavers. It was then, as we moved out slowly from the sofas, that i stood behind that girl and i sighed to myself a silent sigh equivalent to: 'oh my goodness'. That night was the first time i had seen that girl for 7 years; she had 'chong xian jiang hu'[ed]. To be more accurate on my previous statements, that night was the first time i had heard her speak. But her voice was also what i imagined it to be - warm and gentle. I'd never known a girl with such a presence. Even from 7 years ago, the way she held her books with her arms straight, sticking tightly to her body and walked in comfortable silence, with two friends beside her. And I would be walking past her in the corridor not knowing what to do with my eyes. These were still frames in my mind. This presence i cannot describe, but the best word in my vocabulary is respect. I tested myself with the hand holding test, where she, in my imagination asked me to hold her hand. I did, and i crumbled or in more realistic terms, my heart was in for a wringing, like the feeling of two hands wringing a wet towel dry. That night, I ran out of things to talk to her about really fast. And i could tell that she remembered me from 7 years ago, though we had never spoken a word to each other face to face.

Many years ago, i would walk home everyday carrying a bag full of books under the sizzling sun for up to half an hour (because my brother claims that i take a rest half way). At my door, i would be quite out of my mind but my animated conscience would prance up to me and say: "if you knew that you would be able to see a short glimpse of her again if you walk right now 10 times the distance you just walked, would you walk?" I said yes most of the time.

Many years ago, on a holiday along the great ocean road, my dad and i stood on a rock overlooking the twelve apostles. He put his arms around me and said: "na... ni xian zai you mei you xi huan shei?" (do you like somebody now?) It was probably the first time he'd ever asked that question. And i said: "yes." Then his eyes peered to the left and the right, and the conversation stopped there. Now my dad asks me the question on a regular basis.

I had not been looking for her, and now she is back. So now is the time to block her out. I really stand on no ground to have an interest in her, because i really know very little about her. And for that very little, i take no interest.

[GONG~]

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(3)

I remember the time i had a fight with a football lover in grade 6. I had gotten really mad at the guy, and i did not know how to control my emotions. So at the time, i was punching and kicking and crying in the sand pit as our friends pulled us away from each other. Ever since, i had not involved myself in a fight.

So ever since, i had been itching for a fight. And the perfect opportunity arrived, when the details of the annual melbourne high school taekwondo competition were finalized. After reading the requirements, i was extremely pleased, because firstly the classes were by height, and i was 169, and the fighting style was: any - as long as there was no grappling or sweeping. I was ecstatic, because i did not know a bit of taekwondo. And here was my opportunity for a free license to fight to my heart's content.

It was listed on the fixture that i was to be up against 'fat chan'. A few friends came to tell me the terrible news. Terrible, because 'fat chan' was good. I would say that he more powerful than fat, and at the same time a fighter. I didn't know what to expect, and while i was practicing my kicks someone came up to advise me on fat chan's jump kick, which was his most powerful kick, and probably his KO hit, and possibly the only move he has. The time came 15 minutes before the competition that i realized that we needed protection to enter the competition. I found somebody and borrowed their mouth guard and box just in time, as I was called to the arena, where up to a hundred pairs of eyes were looking at me. The referee grappled me into my place on the mat, we bowed, and the 'fight' chop was given.

At first I didn't know what to do, because I'd never fought this style before. Taekwondo is supposed to be a kicking sport. But score can be obtained via effective arm strikes. We circled for a while until fat chan came at me with some body sticking. What is body sticking? It simply happens when two inexperienced fighters get into a spar, and throw all the technique out the window, and eventually are just slapping each other's bodies. Among the turmoil, fat chan's hands thrusted out to create some space between us and backed a step. I saw it in his eyes that his single move KO was coming on. And when it did, it was so quick - it was a shriek, then a high jump, finished with a right-legged thump. It had me all over the place within half a second. And i was down. Not because he connected at all, but because i knew that the referee would not allow players to hit somebody who was down, and i took the time to rest for one second. It had only been a matter of seconds since the beginning of the fight, and my energy had already been muchly drained. It was the nerves, the heavy breathing and all the shifty movements that i performed. I longed to fall over over and over again so that i could have some more rest.

But now, the time had come. I turned my eyes to a group of two friends on the side bench and i nodded. They nodded back, but before i could communicate my full message, the referee was standing over me telling me to get back up or else i forfeit. No no, couldn't do that. I chose to stand up - very slowly.

As I began to stand up, the music faded in. It was jay chow's 'shuang jie gun' live. I knew the song, and i knew that the intro was the time for me to 'recharge'. The music was turned on quite soft, and most people wouldn't have made it out, but i knew the song, and the song was just loud enough for it to burn inside me. A lot of faces turned to where the music was coming from, but most of the eyes eventually fixed on the spar, so no one bothered to interfere. When it hit the verse, I felt a flame in my heart as energy returned to my lungs. I plodded a few steps forward and went where the music took me. For every fast rhythm, my arms pounded like machine guns, and for every exclaimed pause, it was a lunge. At that point in time, i felt that i held utmost advantage, because only i had known the song, and my opponent's moves just did not fit the song; he was all over the place by the day's standards. By the chorus, there wasn't too much left in me, but the wonder and satisfaction of fighting with the music spurred me on. The 'ha!' twice a chorus was the killer. I didn't have to turn my head toward the cd player to know that each time my two friends were banking on the 'ha's with their strong body language. The variety of combos available to me on that day were incredible. I look back on it today and i revise all my moves, to see how it could defeat a taller and stronger opponent. I won the round by 1 point. I had defeated fat chan.

This is the power of music. I learned about it a few years back, through a chinese production with the famous actor 'sun yue'. He acted a scene where he had to put down his love - his beautiful, loyal dog with a stick because the dog was slowly dying in pain after getting hit from saving the actor from a motorbike accident. He acted the scene with no music, and yet the emotion that was expressed, touched. The reason why the director chose to have no music was probably to show the expression of sun yue, that to touch, requires no music. I don't know if you've tried muting a romantic walk in the park with leaves blowing and cameras panning, a horror movie at its climax, or a touching reflection. But without music, it is likely not going to move you in any way. I took this knowledge into the competition, and foresaw it to work powerfully - it had power to influence the body, and to harden the mind.

I love to watch tv series where good guys see bad guys do bad stuff in public, and the good guys cannot bear leave it alone. I always wish in real life that i was the good guy. Because that is one of the few occasions where i can have a free hit. I am a boy. I do itch for it.

[GONG~]

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Two stories are of truth and the other one has a slight tweak of the truth.
Are you ready to play I Guess, I Guess, I Guess Guess Guess?